Gym. I was doing good there for a while- but lost my momentum. Need to try the "after dinner" plan again. :)
Food. I haven't logged with SparkPeople.com in a while- I REALLY need to get back in the habit. It definitely makes a difference for me.
Work. I am really loving my job this year. With that, though, I've put a lot more time and effort into it- which has caused a bit of stress- but I can work it out. ;o)
Play. Just got back from vacation- For the first time ever, Chas and I left the kids with the grandparents (MaryLu & Charlie) and went on vacation on our own! We spent three nights at the beach and it was LOVELY! First vacation in a LONG time that left me feeling rested at the end instead of frazzled!
Family. Last week, my grandma had a stroke and spent a week in the hospital. No physical effects, but she has no memory - she can only talk about life up until she married Grandpa. While she was in the hospital, aunt Patti was in a terrible car accident. The car was totaled and no one expected survivors- but somehow, she escaped with only bruises. They are trying to figure out what caused her blurry/double vision that led to the crash.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Life turned upside down.
The past month and a half have been out of this world.
On Sunday, March 11th, my mom called to tell me that my brother Jonathan passed away. He had recently moved "home" from Massachusetts and broken up with his girlfriend/baby-mama, and was living with our Grandma. My grandma's nurse had weekends off, so my brother served as her caregiver on those days. Saturday night, he'd been changing all the clocks back (for daylight savings time) when she went to bed. She slept all night, and when she woke up in the morning, she found him lying on the floor in the living room. He'd been dead for hours. He had untreated medical conditions (Hashimoto's disease and possible COPD), and was known to use drugs, though we don't know what/when/how much. His cause of death has yet to be determined.
The memorial was held the following week. Chas, the kids, and I went down and stayed with my mom. It was surreal. I know my grieving process has been different from my mom, dad, and brother- I felt like I lost him when they moved to Massachusetts. When he'd admitted to me that he'd participated in drug ring- cashing in fraudulant prescriptions, and that they were running from the law. They left for Massachusetts the day before Thanksgiving. I begged for him to leave the baby with me. I told him- if they got caught, Ashton would be in foster care- just leave him with me until things are sorted out. He said they wouldn't get in trouble. I cried and cried. I felt like I lost him/them that day. They lived in Massachusetts for 4 months before coming home. During that time, neither of them had a job - and they lived in the basement of a relative of babymama's.
I never met my nephew until after my brother passed away. I held him for the first time at the memorial service. He was 10 months old.
After Jonathan passed, my mom made an arrangement with baby-mama. Mom and Michael would keep Ashton every Tuesday. It would be "grandma & grandpa time". Well, on the 20th, he came for his first stay. He spent the night, and on Wednesday, my mom called and called to find out when to take him home. No answer. She found out later that there'd been a drug raid that morning. Babymama, her husband, her sister, and all their friends had been arrested on drug charges. The charges they thought they'd escaped.
The Department of Children & Families placed each of babymama's other children (they were all there when the house was raided) with a member of their paternal family (4 kids, 4 different daddies). One of the grandmas has permanent guardianship of the boy. THe others are with family members in "temporary custody"... My nephew was with my mom, they deemed that a safe arrangement, and they left him there. He was not considered a "placement" or anything- just left in the place where he was...
Babymama has been in jail for a month now. She hasn't signed any papers granting my mom legal rights/responsibilities to Ashton. He got sick, and my mom begged the doctor to see him- legally, he should only have been seen if accompanied by a guardian. Thankfully, the doctor prescribed the antibiotics for his double ear infection.
At this point, babymama has gotten an "Emergency Bail Reduction Hearing" scheduled- on the grounds that "there is no one to care for" her child. I'd like to call BS on that.
We consulted a lawyer who said that Children & Families could help- they could file a dependency action and we could get him placed with my mom or me (hopefully me- my mom has trouble keeping up with a toddler!). However, the social worker has only informed my mom that if she cannot care for him, he'll be put in foster care, even if the only thing hindering her from caring for him fully is a signature. :(
It doesn't help that there are other factors as well. Babymama still married- she put husband's name on the birth certificate, but gave the baby my brother's last name. I live in a separate state- causes problems. Retainer for the lawyer is five THOUSAND dollars!
This has been the most sad, stressful, frustrating, headache-inducing, heart-wrenching thing I've even been through. And it's far from over.
Through all this, as you might imagine, I've relapsed into emotional eating. I've stuffed myself sick. Many times. As a result, I've regained all I lost earlier this year, and am currently several pounds over my 2012 starting weight. I hate it. But I'm so tense and upset- that I continue to binge. I'm sad- and scared- the thought of that baby boy going to a stranger makes me sick.
Please be thinking of him. Me. Us.
On Sunday, March 11th, my mom called to tell me that my brother Jonathan passed away. He had recently moved "home" from Massachusetts and broken up with his girlfriend/baby-mama, and was living with our Grandma. My grandma's nurse had weekends off, so my brother served as her caregiver on those days. Saturday night, he'd been changing all the clocks back (for daylight savings time) when she went to bed. She slept all night, and when she woke up in the morning, she found him lying on the floor in the living room. He'd been dead for hours. He had untreated medical conditions (Hashimoto's disease and possible COPD), and was known to use drugs, though we don't know what/when/how much. His cause of death has yet to be determined.
The memorial was held the following week. Chas, the kids, and I went down and stayed with my mom. It was surreal. I know my grieving process has been different from my mom, dad, and brother- I felt like I lost him when they moved to Massachusetts. When he'd admitted to me that he'd participated in drug ring- cashing in fraudulant prescriptions, and that they were running from the law. They left for Massachusetts the day before Thanksgiving. I begged for him to leave the baby with me. I told him- if they got caught, Ashton would be in foster care- just leave him with me until things are sorted out. He said they wouldn't get in trouble. I cried and cried. I felt like I lost him/them that day. They lived in Massachusetts for 4 months before coming home. During that time, neither of them had a job - and they lived in the basement of a relative of babymama's.
I never met my nephew until after my brother passed away. I held him for the first time at the memorial service. He was 10 months old.
After Jonathan passed, my mom made an arrangement with baby-mama. Mom and Michael would keep Ashton every Tuesday. It would be "grandma & grandpa time". Well, on the 20th, he came for his first stay. He spent the night, and on Wednesday, my mom called and called to find out when to take him home. No answer. She found out later that there'd been a drug raid that morning. Babymama, her husband, her sister, and all their friends had been arrested on drug charges. The charges they thought they'd escaped.
The Department of Children & Families placed each of babymama's other children (they were all there when the house was raided) with a member of their paternal family (4 kids, 4 different daddies). One of the grandmas has permanent guardianship of the boy. THe others are with family members in "temporary custody"... My nephew was with my mom, they deemed that a safe arrangement, and they left him there. He was not considered a "placement" or anything- just left in the place where he was...
Babymama has been in jail for a month now. She hasn't signed any papers granting my mom legal rights/responsibilities to Ashton. He got sick, and my mom begged the doctor to see him- legally, he should only have been seen if accompanied by a guardian. Thankfully, the doctor prescribed the antibiotics for his double ear infection.
At this point, babymama has gotten an "Emergency Bail Reduction Hearing" scheduled- on the grounds that "there is no one to care for" her child. I'd like to call BS on that.
We consulted a lawyer who said that Children & Families could help- they could file a dependency action and we could get him placed with my mom or me (hopefully me- my mom has trouble keeping up with a toddler!). However, the social worker has only informed my mom that if she cannot care for him, he'll be put in foster care, even if the only thing hindering her from caring for him fully is a signature. :(
It doesn't help that there are other factors as well. Babymama still married- she put husband's name on the birth certificate, but gave the baby my brother's last name. I live in a separate state- causes problems. Retainer for the lawyer is five THOUSAND dollars!
This has been the most sad, stressful, frustrating, headache-inducing, heart-wrenching thing I've even been through. And it's far from over.
Through all this, as you might imagine, I've relapsed into emotional eating. I've stuffed myself sick. Many times. As a result, I've regained all I lost earlier this year, and am currently several pounds over my 2012 starting weight. I hate it. But I'm so tense and upset- that I continue to binge. I'm sad- and scared- the thought of that baby boy going to a stranger makes me sick.
Please be thinking of him. Me. Us.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Scrappy Sunday!
I'll post my creations in a bit- but had to share a freebie site I just found! :)
http://digifree.craftcrave.com/2010/03/digital-scrapbooking-freebies-full_02.html
Happy Scrapping!
OK: Back with some pages to post! :)
http://digifree.craftcrave.com/2010/03/digital-scrapbooking-freebies-full_02.html
Happy Scrapping!
OK: Back with some pages to post! :)
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
End of November / Florida Trip
What an eventful (and not in a fun way) month we've had.
Car accident- NO FUN. Can I just tell you- I am now looking both ways about 20 times before I pull out into traffic. *sigh*
Grandma moving into assisted living. I'm not there to help, but get frequent updates from my mom about the moving and decluttering process. I cannot fathom the STUFF that accumulates when a family has lived in the same house for SIXTY years.
Grandpa passing away. After discussions went on for nearly a week, he was moved to Hospice. My grandma spent the night with him for the first time in about two months. He passed away the next day. My mom and grandma were with him; he closed his eyes and just didn't draw another breath. I'm glad he went peacefully. I'm thankful that he's no longer in pain. I am grateful beyond words that I was able to visit last month- to take the kids and see him one last time. I am glad that I was NOT there for the cruel, hateful things that were said to my mom, aunt, and grandma by my uncle. I don't know that I could have responded respectfully.
Even though it may not have made sense financially, Chas agreed to acompany me and the kids to Florida for the service. Abby and Alex both behaved beautifully at the church, but you just never know how those things are going to go- and I couldn't bear the thought of having to walk out with the crying baby or something. A week in Orlando was a bit trying- especially on a shoestring (maybe a threadbare shoestring!) budget, but we relaxed and enjoyed each other's company. The service was nice, and most importantly, my grandma was pleased.
My mom offered to watch the kids, and Chas and I took a SUPER-rare night out. We had the early bird special at a local seafood restaurant (Straubs, for those familiar with the Altamonte area- yummy and great service, too!) and then went to the movies! I can't even remember the last time I went to the movies!! LOL We saw "Men Who Stare at Goats" and we both enjoyed it. :)
Thanksgiving was wonderful. Aunts, uncles, and cousins all present (well, except the one who might have gotten beat up if he'd attended). Wonderful company, excellent food, and an overall great way to spend the holiday.
We went to a "Black Friday Brunch" at the home of one of my sorority sisters. There were a bunch of us there- spouses and kids in tow. I think there were a total of NINE little ones- ranging from a few weeks old (Teresa's twins) to four and a half (my big girl!). It was wonderful to share our little bundles of joy- and to reminisce.
After all that time in Orlando, we headed to Jacksonville to see Chas's family. We were only able to stay two nights- but they were nice. I always enjoy spending time with my in-laws. We were sad to find, Friday night, that my mother-in-law's aunt passed away. She lived 95 wonderful years, but it is always sad to see someone go.
We're now home. Thank goodness. And entering the crazy holiday season. I can't believe Christmas is 23 days away! There's so much to do! ACK! This Saturday alone, I have four places to be... pretty much at the same time. LOL We're going to try our best to make it to three of them- family photos, brunch with Santa, and a birthday party. I'm sad Abby's missing the opportunity to be in a parade- but they were the last ones to advise us of the event... so they didn't make "the cut". ;)
Enough blogging for one lunch time. More another time. :)
Car accident- NO FUN. Can I just tell you- I am now looking both ways about 20 times before I pull out into traffic. *sigh*
Grandma moving into assisted living. I'm not there to help, but get frequent updates from my mom about the moving and decluttering process. I cannot fathom the STUFF that accumulates when a family has lived in the same house for SIXTY years.
Grandpa passing away. After discussions went on for nearly a week, he was moved to Hospice. My grandma spent the night with him for the first time in about two months. He passed away the next day. My mom and grandma were with him; he closed his eyes and just didn't draw another breath. I'm glad he went peacefully. I'm thankful that he's no longer in pain. I am grateful beyond words that I was able to visit last month- to take the kids and see him one last time. I am glad that I was NOT there for the cruel, hateful things that were said to my mom, aunt, and grandma by my uncle. I don't know that I could have responded respectfully.
Even though it may not have made sense financially, Chas agreed to acompany me and the kids to Florida for the service. Abby and Alex both behaved beautifully at the church, but you just never know how those things are going to go- and I couldn't bear the thought of having to walk out with the crying baby or something. A week in Orlando was a bit trying- especially on a shoestring (maybe a threadbare shoestring!) budget, but we relaxed and enjoyed each other's company. The service was nice, and most importantly, my grandma was pleased.
My mom offered to watch the kids, and Chas and I took a SUPER-rare night out. We had the early bird special at a local seafood restaurant (Straubs, for those familiar with the Altamonte area- yummy and great service, too!) and then went to the movies! I can't even remember the last time I went to the movies!! LOL We saw "Men Who Stare at Goats" and we both enjoyed it. :)
Thanksgiving was wonderful. Aunts, uncles, and cousins all present (well, except the one who might have gotten beat up if he'd attended). Wonderful company, excellent food, and an overall great way to spend the holiday.
We went to a "Black Friday Brunch" at the home of one of my sorority sisters. There were a bunch of us there- spouses and kids in tow. I think there were a total of NINE little ones- ranging from a few weeks old (Teresa's twins) to four and a half (my big girl!). It was wonderful to share our little bundles of joy- and to reminisce.
After all that time in Orlando, we headed to Jacksonville to see Chas's family. We were only able to stay two nights- but they were nice. I always enjoy spending time with my in-laws. We were sad to find, Friday night, that my mother-in-law's aunt passed away. She lived 95 wonderful years, but it is always sad to see someone go.
We're now home. Thank goodness. And entering the crazy holiday season. I can't believe Christmas is 23 days away! There's so much to do! ACK! This Saturday alone, I have four places to be... pretty much at the same time. LOL We're going to try our best to make it to three of them- family photos, brunch with Santa, and a birthday party. I'm sad Abby's missing the opportunity to be in a parade- but they were the last ones to advise us of the event... so they didn't make "the cut". ;)
Enough blogging for one lunch time. More another time. :)
Thankful Project recap
I was unable to complete the thankful project in realtime because I ended up in Orlando and without internet access for over a week. But here are the remaining items on the list.
11/19 (Day 10) I am thankful for my husband. I appreciate, so much, the fact that you put aside what seemed practical, in order to support me this week.
11/20 (Day 11) I am thankful for my children who are amazingly well behaved when the situation calls for such.
11/21 (Day 12) I am thankful for reason, which my grandmother retains, regardless of what anyone else says.
11/22 (Day 13) I am thankful for beautiful weather, and the opportunity to spend time outdoors with the ones I love.
11/23 (Day 14) I am thankful for credit cards, and sleeping at the Sheridan.
11/24 (Day 15) I am thankful for modern medicine and its ability to erase minor discomforts.
11/25 (Day 16) I am thankful for having fun with my children- and also for the rare opportunity to spend adult time without them.
11/26 (Thanksgiving Day) I am thankful for my family, for the opportunity to gather with them, and for the food and togetherness we share.
I actually think I will add "Gratitude Journal" entries to my blog here, as I know it will help me to focus on the positive throughout the year.
Post-Thanksgiving entries:
I am grateful for my in-laws. I am a very lucky girl to have married into such a sane, supportive, loving family.
I am grateful for the car-knowledge held by my brother in law. Thank you for saving me from overspending at the auto-shop!
I am grateful to finally receive a (nearly) whole paycheck, after two months of measly ones. Phew!!
11/19 (Day 10) I am thankful for my husband. I appreciate, so much, the fact that you put aside what seemed practical, in order to support me this week.
11/20 (Day 11) I am thankful for my children who are amazingly well behaved when the situation calls for such.
11/21 (Day 12) I am thankful for reason, which my grandmother retains, regardless of what anyone else says.
11/22 (Day 13) I am thankful for beautiful weather, and the opportunity to spend time outdoors with the ones I love.
11/23 (Day 14) I am thankful for credit cards, and sleeping at the Sheridan.
11/24 (Day 15) I am thankful for modern medicine and its ability to erase minor discomforts.
11/25 (Day 16) I am thankful for having fun with my children- and also for the rare opportunity to spend adult time without them.
11/26 (Thanksgiving Day) I am thankful for my family, for the opportunity to gather with them, and for the food and togetherness we share.
I actually think I will add "Gratitude Journal" entries to my blog here, as I know it will help me to focus on the positive throughout the year.
Post-Thanksgiving entries:
I am grateful for my in-laws. I am a very lucky girl to have married into such a sane, supportive, loving family.
I am grateful for the car-knowledge held by my brother in law. Thank you for saving me from overspending at the auto-shop!
I am grateful to finally receive a (nearly) whole paycheck, after two months of measly ones. Phew!!
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Thankful: Day 5
Today, I am thankful for my family- of the immediate variety. I have a husband who is more supportive than I deserve. Even when I feel like a total screw up, he's still right there. I have a 4 year old who seems to have passed through the needy-new-sibling phase and is now my positive attitude, great helper, mature beyond her years girl. :) And there's my baby boy... What can I say? A grin and a giggle from my little chunker just melts my heart. <3 *sigh*
...I'd add a family picture here- but we don't have one of all 4 of us! ACK! Must get on that!!
...I'd add a family picture here- but we don't have one of all 4 of us! ACK! Must get on that!!
Saturday, October 24, 2009
First Blog!
I've been wanting to start a blog for a long time (like, since my four year old was born!) and I'm finally doing it. :) I can't promise to post all the time- but who knows, maybe it will happen.
Life at the moment...
Chas and I have lived in McDonough for a little over 4 years. We have a lovely 4 year old girl named Abby and a two month old boy named Alex. We're a pretty average, happy family, I think.
I'm teaching ESOL, for the third year now, and I love it. It is so much more gratifying to me than the frustrating I felt in the general education classroom. In this economy, I am thankful each day for my job, and I hope that my position remains secure for years to come.
After years of saying I want to get healthy (or get "skinny" depending on the day), I'm making real changes. I use SparkPeople.com to log my calories and exercise. After having Alex, I lost my pregnancy weight fairly quickly, and upon being cleared by my doctor 6 weeks after delivery, set a short term goal of losing 25 pounds. I'm already more than half way there, and still charging ahead. It's all mind-set, really, and I've finally got my mind in the right place. :)
As for the title of my blog- do you have mommy brain? Some days I think Mommy Brain is a wonderful thing. You know all the random knowledge that mothers possess? I am full of useful (or useless, depending on your POV) information about preschool development, songs, and shows; about where to find the best deals on kid stuff; about exactly how *my* kids need to be tucked in to achieve sleepdom, etc... Other days- most of the time, actually- I experience the other side of "Mommy Brain". I forget where I put my keys, where I parked the car, what day it is, if I brushed my teeth or now, and a multitude of other things. So, here, I shall share the random ramblings of *My* Mommy Brain.
www.AbbyLaneAndAlexJames.blogspot.com
Life at the moment...
Chas and I have lived in McDonough for a little over 4 years. We have a lovely 4 year old girl named Abby and a two month old boy named Alex. We're a pretty average, happy family, I think. I'm teaching ESOL, for the third year now, and I love it. It is so much more gratifying to me than the frustrating I felt in the general education classroom. In this economy, I am thankful each day for my job, and I hope that my position remains secure for years to come.
After years of saying I want to get healthy (or get "skinny" depending on the day), I'm making real changes. I use SparkPeople.com to log my calories and exercise. After having Alex, I lost my pregnancy weight fairly quickly, and upon being cleared by my doctor 6 weeks after delivery, set a short term goal of losing 25 pounds. I'm already more than half way there, and still charging ahead. It's all mind-set, really, and I've finally got my mind in the right place. :)
As for the title of my blog- do you have mommy brain? Some days I think Mommy Brain is a wonderful thing. You know all the random knowledge that mothers possess? I am full of useful (or useless, depending on your POV) information about preschool development, songs, and shows; about where to find the best deals on kid stuff; about exactly how *my* kids need to be tucked in to achieve sleepdom, etc... Other days- most of the time, actually- I experience the other side of "Mommy Brain". I forget where I put my keys, where I parked the car, what day it is, if I brushed my teeth or now, and a multitude of other things. So, here, I shall share the random ramblings of *My* Mommy Brain.
www.AbbyLaneAndAlexJames.blogspot.com
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